Is the Acura MDMA the car of our Drug-Addled Future?

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We exist as parts of an enthusiast society. Both as individuals and as a collective population, we find things that we love: music, art, film, literature, sports, cars, guns. We then use that enthusiastic obsession as a foundation for our education, career path or simple use of our spare time. And in doing so, we discover, we innovate, we find ways to improve upon those things that we love.

Meet Raul “2NOZL” Dominguez (age 27) former sales associate of a car dealership specializing in Acura, Costa Mesa “Most Influential 30 under 30” recipient, and aspiring EDM deejay. Certain that he has the ability to fill the vacancy left by the death of iconic deejay Avicii, Dominguez is prepared to take his highly successful business to Las Vegas, in the hopes of scoring entry to the industry he loves that much.

But 2NOZL (editor’s note: pronounced “deuce-nozzle,” not “two-nozzle”) loves more than just, mindless trance-inducing dance music. In fact, he’s using his planned move to inspire a groundbreaking amalgam of the three things that own his heart: EDM music, his used Acura ILX and, of course, Molly.

For the benefit of those who might be unaware, “Molly” (also known as “MDMA” or 3,4-Methylenedioxymethamphetamine) is a synthetic mood and perception-altering drug that has been a mainstay of the club and rave circuit for years. And for everyone else, Acura is a lineup of cars which continues to exist despite the fact that no-one ever seems to buy one. I mean, seriously, have you ever driven an Acura? Do YOU know anyone who owns, or has owned an Acura? No? Well, now you know 2NOZL…

Anyhoo, 2NOZL’s decision to pack up his life in Costa Mesa and move to Vegas was not one that he came to lightly.

“I knew that I’d have to make a name for myself immediately once I got there, get the word out on the streets. So, I loaded up my ILX with all of my sound equipment, rigged up to play out the windows for passers-by everywhere, and loaded up the car with plenty of MDMA. The plan would be to park wherever I could, hand out the Molly, and get everyone dancing throughout the city. I’d be like a street busker from the future, y’all.”

But unknown to 2NOZL, his plans to modify the Acura had also inspired his brother Chuy, who still worked for the dealership, and now had an idea of how to make a name for himself. His plan was to use the dealership’s facilities to create some customized ILX which would cater to EDM enthusiasts. He would name the vehicles the Acura MDMA.

According to the Costa Mesa Police Department, “We received a call from the General Manager of Costa Mesa Acura, requesting the apprehension of a current employee on suspicion of embezzlement, drug trafficking, and other unnamed charges. He claimed that Mr. Dominguez was modifying existing dealer inventory with non-purchased sound equipment, and inventorying each vehicle with illegal methamphetamines intended for personal distribution.”

2NOZL declined to comment…unless, of course, he was just waiting for the beat to drop.

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