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The Pumpkin Spice Wrangler is Back (This Time for Real)

Jeep Wrangler JL in Punkn Orange, in the background of a #basicbitchselfie
It’s been about two years since the world was first tricked into believing that FCA intended to release a limited-edition #PumpkinSpice Wrangler aimed at all the #BasicBitches out there. Here’s a brief excerpt of our original story. “According to industry insiders, all 1000 pre-orders were filled faster than a white girl can slip into yoga pants and Ugg boots....

Jeff Goldblum is the New Face of GM

GM's Mary Barra Looks on at the Automaker's New Spokesperson, actor Jeff Goldblum.
General Motors can’t seem to catch a break. Criticism over layoffs and closures. The Silverado being unseated from the #2 position by the RAM 1500. And, of course, the recent barrage of criticisms being levied at them by the President of the United States, as a result of their ever-diminishing presence in Detroit. And while some would argue that their...

Can’t Stand the Rain? Mazda Has Plans

Missy 'Misdemeanor" Elliott: the new face of Mazda?
In a display of arbitrary popularity surge unseen since all of social media decided to collectively canonize Keanu Reeves as some sort of earthbound demigod, Missy' Misdemeanor' Elliott is currently being hoisted up by the masses after receiving MTV's Video Vanguard award last month. Now…you might be confused by the realization that MTV still values music - or even...

This Fall…Disneyland…Bieber v. Cruise

Stats for the Bieber vs Cruise fight are side-by-side with the 2019 Ford Edge vs 2019 Dodge Journey sponsors.
Just when a lull in automotive headlines made it seem like random conversations comparing the 2019 Ford Edge vs 2019 Dodge Journey could end up being the premier automotive headline of the summer, the seeds of a more compelling showdown were being sowed (not that that’s saying much). On June 9th, Justin Bieber set Twitter (as well as Scientology, the...

Puerto Rican Governor Resigns. But What About that Truck?

The Chevy symbol is over Rosselló's face in front of the Puerto Rican flag because his old Suburban may be a valuable used car for sale.
If you’re searching used cars for sale in San Juan, Puerto Rico - and are interested in a fully-loaded lightly-used bulletproof Chevy Suburban - well, it looks like you’ve missed your chance. With the word ‘embattled’ being thrown around at almost unprecedented levels, the public outcry against 2nd-generation Puerto Rican Governor Ricardo Rosselló compelled the corrupt and clearly unqualified elected...

Texas: No Country for Ol’ Chevys

A cowboy is on a fence looking at his white Chevy Silverado HD towing machinery after leaving a Chevy dealership in Dallas.
When at a Chevy dealership in Dallas, truck buyers must feel a little bit out of place. Each fall, automotive journalists and manufacturer representatives alike meet up for a two-day event hosted by the Texas Auto Writers Association, assessing the industry's most popular cars, trucks, crossovers, and SUVS - at least in the eyes of Texans. And in the...

Toyota to Revive the Matrix with Keanu Reeves

Keanu Reeves in character as NEO from 'The Matrix' films, shown next to a Toyota Matrix
  It was 2014 when Toyota announced that they would be discontinuing the Matrix, after more than a decade. Since then, Toyota has provided no indication that they plan to resurrect the lame-ass hatchback…but then again, no-one has really been asking for them to do so. Let me tell you why you’re here. You’re here because you know something. What you...

Teen Health Warning: Vaping Can Lead to Buying a KIA

Vaping Car Salesman Pitching a Prospective CarBuyer on a KIA Covered with Pro-Vaping Bumper Stickers
  Baltimore MD - In our experience, live auto news reports are crossing over to influence other industries more than ever. While cross-marketing synergies (which often make sense) are most often to blame, every once in a while there’s an overlap that we never saw coming, in an industry we wouldn’t have expected, which throws us for a loop. A...

Woman Takes Selfie with Jeep, Ruins Life

A woman is taking selfies with her Jeep Cherokee, which aids in the 2019 Ford Edge vs 2019 Jeep Cherokee comparison.
Los Angeles, CA - A woman’s recent decision to take a selfie with her new purchase may have solved the month-long debate of the 2019 Ford Edge vs 2019 Jeep Cherokee. How so? Well, as you’re about to learn, only morons opt for Jeeps. Kaitlyn McGovern recently went grocery shopping on a June afternoon. On the way home, Kaitlyn decided...

Magician Buys Ford Escape for Act, Is Very Disappointed

A magician is holding a fanned deck of cards in front of a white Ford Escape, which is a popular new Ford for sale.
Imagine spending $50,000 and realizing that your recent purchase doesn’t satisfy your (very) specific needs. That’s what happened recently to a Las Vegas entertainer after he spent a pretty penny on a new Ford for sale. Ron McIntyre of the little-known and struggling act “Magic with Mac” saw an ad for a brand-new Ford Escape. While the magician understood that...