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Smoke Emerging from a Giant Pile of Tires Outside of GM Headquarters Turns White, Indicating the 2023 Chevy Silverado 1500 is Now For Sale.

The GM headquarters is shown with a white pillar of smoke in front of it.
Here at The Lemon, we’re proud of the journalistic integrity that we adhere to. And every so often, we live up to our namesake by “squeezing out” the stories that affect you and the automotive industry that you certainly won’t read anywhere else. And today, we’re witnessing a momentous event that we’re sure is going to incite much excitement...

2023 Chevy Colorado Earns GM Another “Made-up” Award

A crowd of people are shown giving an award to a dealer that has a Chevy Colorado.
There are many criteria by which trucks can be judged: engine power and performance, towing and payload capacity, the fullness and girth of their bumpers... But in order to really judge and compare different trucks, it’s important to always consider the class one falls into; otherwise, you could look at a full-size model like the Ram 1500 and compare...

Science Watch: New Study Confirms Correlation Between Truck Size and Penis Size

A doctor is shown with an anatomy model in front of a 2023 Chevy Silverado 3500 HD.
It’s no secret the vehicle that a person drives often reflects different aspects of their personality. And while high-end sports cars are synonymous with those entering a midlife crisis and minivans were once the hallmark of someone who was family-oriented, a new medical study conducted by Harvard University has led to some recent news that many people have always...

Five Keys to Choosing the Right Online Car Seller

A man is shown browsing for an online car dealer while wearing a clown nose.
If you’re shopping for a car online, then you’ve made a good choice, and I’m proud of you for getting to this point on your own –– but your brain has taken you as far as it can. Now, you need me to pick up the withered husk of your cerebellum and carry you the next hundred feet to...

Harley-Davidson: The New Face of Severe Brain Damage (and “Crotch-Rot”?)

A man is shown standing in front of a 2022 Harley-Davidson Road King Special.
There’s no doubt that the year is going to be an exciting one for fans of Harley-Davidson. Especially with the 2022 Harley-Davidson Road King Special, which is still generating quite a bit of buzz here in early 2023. It’s seldom that we get to talk to a long-time Harley owner, but we got to do just that when we...

80’s Wrestling Icon Gets Steamy About the Ford Explorer

A white 2023 Ford Explorer is shown in a sauna.
In recent years, former professional wrestler “The Iron Sheik” has gained a second career as a social media darling. Known for his unchained personality and unique use of the English language, which is usually laden with insults and profanity, he’s never dull in any podcast or interview. With the all-new 2023 Ford Explorer coming out, we reached out to...

New Evidence Confirms What We All Knew

Two woman and a man are shown in front of a black 2021 McLaren Senna.
Fast car = small penis. How’s that for an attention-grabbing opening line? My editor has been riding me lately about how I start so many of my articles with, “Rambling nonsense that makes yourself sound smarter than everyone else,” and how I, “Don’t work here anymore, stop sending us assignments. Please, for the love of god!” So here you...

Three Ways the Jeep Renegade Embodies the Spirit of The Lemon

A yellow 2023 Jeep Renegade is shown from the front at an angle in The Lemon's office.
Here at The Lemon, we believe in three things: opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve; long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days; and that every vehicle should be judged solely by its merits. We hold ourselves to the highest automotive standards, and while other news outlets within the lamestream media heap praise onto...

Russia’s Loss is America’s Gain as Traffic Becomes Less of a Hassle

A used SUV for sale near you, a grey Chevy Equinox, is shown equipped with a Raytheon missile launcher.
There's a lot of excitement regarding the upcoming 2023 model year. Many of the different brands that are scattered across the entire scope of the industry are attempting to one-up one another as the spirit of competition is at its absolute strongest. A recent chain of events in the form of a new announcement from GM might lead many...

Ford Replaces “Pedestrian Detection” with “Pedestrian Destruction” For All 2024 Models

Children are shown being targeted by pedestrian destruction technology after exiting a 2023 Ford F-450.
The innovation and further development in the automotive industry have always been impressive. Among the brands that have always sought to shift the paradigm and take things to a whole new level, Ford has always been on the cutting edge. And while there’s certainly a lot of acclaim that their semi-autonomous ‘blue cruise’ has achieved in recent years, a...

5 Ways Millennials Can Keep Their Car Running Great This Winter

Millennials are shown next to supplies on fire and winter traffic.
The holidays might be behind us, but winter’s just getting started –– it’s easy to forget that winter doesn’t begin until December 21st and goes until March. With that in mind, it’s very important that you take the proper steps to keep your car running well during these cold months and to stay safe on the road. This is...

“Karen’s” Scathing Indictment of Cadillac Goes Completely Unread

A person is shown wiping tears away with money looking at a laptop with Cadillac SUVs for sale.
Ed: Here at The Lemon, we take great pride in our diverse readership. Every day we receive emails from our wide variety of fans: doctors, Rhode Scholars, arsonists, furries, the list goes on! Today, however, we received a rather disturbing letter that seems to suggest that there is a *chuckles* wealth gap in this country?! Uh, yeah, okay, lady....

Bolt EV Burned Your Family to Death? GM Launches New Support Hotline

A baby in a carseat is shown in a Bolt EV next to a fireman.
It’s no secret that the Chevy Bolt EV has been lighting itself on fire for at least a couple of years now, often resulting in its own destruction. Up until this point, however, the fires could be blamed on the batteries in these Battery-Electric Vehicles (BEVs), causing them to erupt into a ruinous conflagration. Things have changed as Chevy...

The Best Nissan to Drive Based on Your Zodiac Sign

The zodiac calendar is shown surrounded by Nissan vehicles from a Nissan dealer.
There are probably a lot of factors you consider when stopping into your local Nissan dealer for a new ride. I’m sure you have a budget in mind, as well as performance and size requirements. You may favor capable all-wheel drive over efficient front-wheel drive, and heated front seats or a good sound system might be absolute musts. These...

We Talked to an Aging Honda Accord Who Argues for the Right to Commit Assisted Suicide

A maroon Honda Accord is shown in a crusher after leaving a lot that had used Hondas for sale.
One of the most controversial topics that have been heavily debated for the past few decades is euthanasia. Until his passing in 2011, Dr. Jack Kevorkian, known to some as “Dr. Death,” helped people who were terminally ill commit assisted suicide. There are those who argue in favor of euthanasia, insisting that people who are ill and live in...

Look Out Men: The Silverado Is For Basic B*tches Only

A pink 2023 Chevy Silverado is shown on a pink background.
I’ve always felt that pickup trucks like the 2023 Chevy Silverado have been marketed too heavily towards the rough, tough, DIYer types. But you know what? I truly believe that when you put the right spin on it, you could really sell the Silverado as the girly girl’s truck. It’s not just construction workers and moving companies that need...

Pregnant Women in the HOV Lane and Other Stupid Things

A road sign for an HOV lane is shown from a low angle.
As we all know, High-Occupancy Vehicle (HOV) lanes are designed to allow vehicles with two or more people in them to have their exclusive use, thereby encouraging folks to carpool together and cut down on the number of cars on the road. Simple enough. Recently, however, a state representative in Texas (named Briscoe Cane because, of course, he is)...

Subaru Celebrates the Crosstrek Because No One Else Will

A green 2023 Subaru Crosstrek is shown from the front at an angle while parked in front of fireworks after leaving a dealer that has a Subaru Crosstrek for sale.
The Subaru Crosstrek is definitely one of the crossover SUVs of all time, and there is no denying that fact. If you’re looking for a Subaru Crosstrek for sale, then you probably already know this, and you have seen that it has features and options available. There’s an engine within the Crosstrek that provides power to its wheels, which...

Basement Dwelling Incel Intimidated at the Prospect of Woman Driving a Truck

A woman is shown standing in front of a red 2023 Ford F-150.
A notable aspect of the automotive industry is its inclusiveness. It’s a world that’s constantly evolving, both in terms of technological innovation and the changing needs of consumers. Possessing no provisions on who can own a vehicle and benefit from what the major manufacturers produce every year, people from all walks of life are free to take part in...

Canada Achieves Automotive Superiority With the Announcement of Socialized Car Maintenance

Canadian flags are shown hanging near a dealer that has a used Nissan Qashqai for sale.
Good afternoon all; I'm Chris the Cannuck. Here in Canada, we've always taken great pride in separating ourselves from our foul-mouthed, annoying neighbours to the south. To be honest, it's very easy to see why. The Americans are a people who deserve sympathy for their complete lack of intelligence and inability to grasp basic concepts. Why, just the other...