Ford Announces Self-Destruct Feature for the 2024 Ford Escape
For those of you who consider yourselves tech-savvy, recent innovations made throughout the automotive industry must be a source of considerable excitement. Many are...
An Upside-Down Phallus or an Invocation to Satan? We Take a Closer Look at...
If you were around during the turbulent decade of the 1980s, you're likely familiar with the period known as the "Satanic Panic," the age...
Highway Accident Provides Evidence I Am a Living God
If you're at all familiar with the tremendous breadth of my award-winning, once-in-a-lifetime journalistic work—which has been lauded as the most important writing of...
Ford Announces It Will No Longer Sell Vehicles to Those With Good Credit
DETROIT, MI — Ford has existed as a symbol of Americana, innovation, and versatility for well over a century. They've always provided options for...
Sales of Commercial Trucks Spike in NY and Nearby Area
As an automotive journalist, I don’t usually pay attention to things like sales figures for vehicles or other types of news. That’s not what...
Ford Announces the 2024 F-150 “Karen Edition”
As one of the most popular vehicles on the road today, the Ford F-150 is a symbol of Americana and, for many, a sacred...
New Gordon Ramsey-voiced GPS Tells You How Terrible of a Driver You Are
TULSA, OK — The last time we visited Kingston Kia, it was for a feature entitled "2023 Ford Explorer vs 2023 Kia Telluride; Which...
I Rode in the Kia Carnival Z06 Prototype
Most days, being an automotive journalist means little more than having ample reason to day-drink and stare out the window as I ponder how...
Chevy Trailblazer That Went Missing While Exploring the Amazon Presumed to be Eaten by...
It was several months ago when an expedition consisting of Ruggero Yates, Edward Monroe, and Faye Jonas left to explore the Amazon region. While...
Three Things the Camry Can Do That the Accord Can’t
Automotive history is filled with epic clashes between vehicular giants and grand rivalries that have shaped the landscape of the industry through endless strife...
The Nissan Rogue is Designed to Hot Box
We all remember the weird commercial for the Kia Soul with the hamsters that were definitely smoking weed right? The trauma that commercial caused...
This Truck Service Is Affordable, Efficient, and Definitely Not a Drug Front
Taking care of a truck can get expensive. If you're like me, you probably work your truck hard, and it is consequently in frequent...
Tesla Disappoints
As a journalist, one of the most important things to me is clarity with my audience: providing you with a clear vision of what...
How to Behave at a Honda Dealership
There was a time when people carried themselves with a certain amount of dignity and class while doing business with a company. You see...
Ford Releases New Jock-Nerd Hybrid
Mixing the power of gasoline with the power of electricity has become old hat—and, besides, it's never really had much appeal for the kind...
[Reprinted From the Classifieds Section of Our Local Newspaper]
"Used Chevy Silverado for Sale."
I have a used Chevy Silverado for sale. It is a 2011 Silverado 1500 with a long bed and crew...
Four Things You Didn’t Know about the Chevy Trailblazer
Hey bestie. I love writing about cars. That’s why I’m here. You love reading about cars. That’s why you’re here. We love cars—car friends...
Covered Wagon or Nissan Pathfinder
There’s a lot of talk out there about these modern vehicles called horseless carriages. Well, I am doubtful that the historical precedent of durability...
Smoke Emerging from a Giant Pile of Tires Outside of GM Headquarters Turns White,...
Here at The Lemon, we’re proud of the journalistic integrity that we adhere to. And every so often, we live up to our namesake...
2023 Chevy Colorado Earns GM Another “Made-up” Award
There are many criteria by which trucks can be judged: engine power and performance, towing and payload capacity, the fullness and girth of their...
