Looking for a Jeep Wrangler? Understanding that you may never get all of the features you want, the arrival of fall is a reminder that Jeep enthusiasts everywhere have good reason to throw shade.
Last year, the U.S. automotive industry was rocked to its foundation when Fiat-Chrysler execs announced an unprecedented plan to target a (largely untapped) demographic with a limited edition vehicle release.
That demographic? A breed of seasonal consumer found almost exclusively in the northeastern United States during the autumn months. That’s right, #basicbitches everywhere were rushing to put their hair up in a messy bun, while donning sunglasses to block out the haters. Jeep was giving them a Jeep all their own.
“Limited Editions are nothing new to automakers,” affirmed FCA CEO Sergio Marchionne. “As with any industry, it’s a great way of generating excitement that is both timely and relevant. It also provides a means of creating something truly unique for a very specific customer base. In that spirit, we are proud to announce the release of our Limited Edition Jeep Wrangler Pumpkin Spice Edition, of which 1000 units will be available for preorder… now.”
According to industry insiders, all 1000 pre-orders were filled faster than a white girl can slip into yoga pants and Ugg boots. No, seriously…that’s not hyperbole. In anticipation of this historic release, the FCA had joined forces with Apple to track any pre-orders originating from iPhones. To absolutely no-one’s surprise, almost all of the pre-orders came from iPhone accounts registered within any of the five New England states.
FCA Associate Director of Social Media Whitney Boutwell (@literallywhitnasty) explained the appeal of the Pumpkin Spice Jeep in an Instagram post captioned, ‘It’s literally the best idea ever. I can’t even. It’s so fucking beautiful, that I fucking hate it #lolz #pumpkinspice #jeepwrangler’. While many were confused that the picture was of herself in a ‘sorority squat’ next to a(n Omaha Orange) Jeep Renegade her enthusiasm was contagious. Actually, it might be more appropriate to say that it was viral, thanks to her 40,000 Instagram followers (approx. 78% of which describe themselves as ‘#instafamous #badbitches who #loveherlol #sorrynotsorry’).
After almost a year of anticipation #thewaitisover. Released on Friday, October 13th the Limited Edition Jeep Wrangler Pumpkin Spice Editions were met with immediate praise. Faster than you can say ‘North Face’ social media was inundated by a sea of posts, captioned with ironic inspirational sayings and emojis.
And just like the proverbial butterfly flapping its wings on the other side of the world, the ripple effect had been felt, meaning that FCA is hardly the only company to benefit from the release. Representatives for both Starbucks CEO Kevin Johnson and Dunkin Donuts CEO Nigel Travis applaud FCA for the Pumpkin Spice Wrangler, which is believed to play a major role in each coffee retailer’s increased Q4 sales.
We spoke to Will Bowers, a new Dunkin Donuts store manager. “I’m told that Autumn months are always popular due to the seasonal release of our Pumpkin Spice menu. Thanks to Jeep, our drive-throughs have never been busier than they’ve been in the last few days. I feel like it’s just a blur of orange Jeeps all morning long. My eyes hurt, but I’m not complaining. This is world-class marketing. The only downside is the amount of Taylor Swift blaring from their stereos as they drive through. I didn’t sign on for this…and I have daughters.”
And speaking of T-Swift, she is only one of a string of celebrities who have thrown their support behind the initiative, tweeting: Just bought a new ride #jeep #lookwhatyoumademedo #LWYMMD.
To those who were unable to obtain one of these First Edition Pumpkin Spice Wranglers, FCA’s Social Media Director advises #dontworry #jkworry #lol #whatamIsaying #hatersgonnahate #playonplaya #ihatemyself #lollllllllllllll
To be completely honest, we’re not even sure what that means. If you need anything, we’ll be over here… weeping for humanity.
…until Peppermint Mocha season rolls around.
