If you go on to any car brand’s press website, you’ll quickly see a list of articles that tout the company’s recent design contests. Often times, the participants are students and future engineers who are looking to put yet another accolade on their college resume. On the flip side, the brand benefits by having these young geniuses generate clever, innovative designs for absolutely zero cost (although the brands would never admit this).

Well, one car brand is taking these design contests to a new level, and they’re being completely transparent about their intentions. Chevy recently announced their “Dads Design Duds” campaign, which calls for all stay-at-home dads to submit their picture-perfect Chevy SUV. While the actual contest might be relatively common, the brand’s statement makes it clear that they’re only in it for one thing: ideas.

“To be honest, we’ve kind of running out of designs for new SUVs,” said Chevy’s Chief Engineer, Nomar Thots. “I mean, when it comes down to it, there’s only so much you can do with a vehicle. We’ve added illuminated cup holders, which we thought were pretty radical. We added a kicking sound system and a touchscreen. We’re all out of ideas, so we figured we’d commission some stay-at-home dads with free time on their hands to come up with some designs for us.”

Between now and the end of September, the brand is accepting any and all designs. The only requirement is that the vehicles must be realistic, and the “creator” promises to hand over all rights to the design to Chevy. The winner will receive a $50 gift card to Olive Garden, although the certificate was given to Thots last Christmas and might expire relatively soon.

Some stay-at-home dads have already started coming up with clever, innovative SUV designs. Raul Tejada, an amateur artist and father of two young girls, spends most of his days changing diapers and watching court shows. Now, Chevy’s contest has given new meaning to his life.

“My normal day consisted of watching my girls, watching Judge Judy, and making frozen mojitos,” Tejada explained. “Now, I’m sitting down with a sketchpad and constantly adding new ideas to my automotive creation!”

As Tejada scribbled furiously into his sketch pad, I was able to get a quick glance at his drawing. The vehicle was certainly well-drawn, but the artist seemingly couldn’t settle on one or two features. Rather, the vehicle included a pair of sun roofs, a television mounted to every seat, an unprecedented three-wheel design, and extendable wings that are intended to give the vehicle “some lift.”

“It’s the most fun I’ve ever had,” Tejada said as he erased his creation’s built-in coffee maker. “If I win this, my wife and I are hiring a babysitter and getting all-you-can-eat soup and salad from Olive Garden!”

Meanwhile, Rocco Montgomery wasn’t as enthused about the contest, claiming the court and his ex-wife were forcing him to participate.

“I don’t have a job and I owe hundreds of bucks a month on child support,” explained Montgomery. “The court told me I had to do something productive with my day, or else I’d go to jail. So I’m basically drawing a couple lines a day until September, and then I’ll probably just go to jail.”

Montgomery gave us a look at his design, which currently consists of a box with four wheels.

“It’s a car,” he said, “I’ll probably buy some crayons to show the difference between the body and the wheels. To be completely honest, I really don’t give two shits about this contest. Get out of my studio apartment.”

Even some elderly homes are getting in on the fun, as the drawings have proven an excellent activity for the older residents. Instead of having these folks watch television or sit alone in their rooms, they now have the opportunity to interact with each other and design their ideal SUV.

“I like flowers, so I drew flowers on the outside of my SUV,” said Mickey Wonders, a 95-year-old man who stands about 4-foot-11. “I call it the ‘Flower SUV,’ and the inside will constantly smell like lilacs, which were my deceased wife’s favorite flowers. We met at the big ball in New York City in 1935. I asked her if she wanted a Moxie, and we ended up necking all night long. Do you like flowers?”

Of course, some residents are a bit confused by the task, like Bernard St.Vincent, who was drawing pictures of flags from around the world.

“I’m a fan of Albania and the two-headed bird,” he said. “I also drew the Belize flag. I’m confident that my illustrations are good enough to win the free tickets to the Cat Stevens concert, though.”

Chevy isn’t just holding their “Dads Design Duds” event. Rather, the company is also looking for individuals to send in name ideas that the brand can use on future SUVs. The brand is currently rolling with the names Trax, Equinox, Traverse, Tahoe, and Suburban, five titles that leave a whole lot to be desired.

“We’re literally picking Scrabble tiles out of a bag and rearranging them to make a name” admitted Thots. “We’re in desperate need of some fresh car nameplates, so we decided we’d hit up Twitter for some suggestions. The responses were…mixed.”

Twitter users will have until the end of August to suggest new SUV names to Chevy. The winner will win a one-dollar scratch-off ticket that Thots found lying under his front seat.

While some of the suggested names that came via Twitter were useful, some could be categorized as racist, vulgar, and inhumane. Some of the entries are listed below:

  • Chevy SunFlower
  • Chevy Flamethrower
  • Chevy Millenia
  • Chevy VoteTrump
  • Chevy Poop
  • Chevy FordIsBetter
  • Chevy CheckOutMyYouTubeChannel#MikeyBall
  • Chevy ThisIsDumb

 

Chevy deserves to be praised for its transparency, as these innovative contests could even end up revolutionizing the industry.

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