DETROIT, MI — Expectations held about the knowledge of America’s auto mechanics have always been relatively high, especially in recent years. After all, with so many advances in safety and driving assistance technology—which seems to increase each passing year—it’s only natural that we expect the technicians working on our vehicles to demonstrate first-rate knowledge and expertise. And many of these individuals will most likely tell you they’ve seen it all. But, as we learned earlier this week, even the most experienced mechanics can be thrown for a loop from time to time. Such is what happened to Billy ‘Spark Plug’ Williams the other day, the head mechanic at CJ’s Chevrolet, a Certified Pre-Owned Chevy truck dealer.
It all began when Kelly Finley, the owner of a 2022 Chevy Equinox, brought her vehicle in for its routine service. From the onset, this seemed relatively normal; after all, millions of Americans bring in their vehicles for routine service, with most auto shops responding to a half-dozen such requests on a daily basis. However, as Williams explained to us, Finley wasn’t like any of his other female customers.
“Most of the time, women don’t know a damn thing about cars,” said Billy ‘Spark Plug’ Williams. “Hell, I can’t tell you how many times they ask me questions like ‘Are brakes supposed to squeak?’ and ‘What does the light with the genie lamp mean?’ But this was something I’d never seen in all my life. This one knew things about cars. She specifically mentioned how there might be a problem with the timing mechanism, and she could actually tell the difference between synthetic and conventional oil. I wouldn’t have believed it if I weren’t there listening to it all.”
What Williams didn’t know was that Finley, the managing editor of an automotive journalism company, deals with the specs and features of a wide variety of automobiles on a daily basis. Upon reaching out for comment, Finley discussed her level of knowledge and experiences in her field.
“Look, this isn’t rocket science. Basic automotive knowledge isn’t difficult to grasp. I’m sure the mechanic thought I didn’t know anything and was looking to give me a hefty repair bill or overcharge me for services I have no need for.” When we asked her about the apparent sexism Williams and other mechanics sometimes display, she told us about a few of her daily experiences. “I’ll be honest—being a part of the automotive industry means working in a literal sausage-fest with dudes who think their dick entitles them to an opinion. Most of the time, they think they can get away with anything. I can’t tell you the number of times I wanted to chop off someone’s dick and feed it to them.”
Is there sexism in the auto repair industry? We asked Williams for his opinion on the matter. “I’m not a sexist. Look, women don’t know as much as men do about cars. That’s not sexism; that’s what all mechanics know.” We asked him about Finley’s claim about overcharging people for unnecessary services. “That’s a lie! Sometimes when we’re working on a car, we just notice things…and it’s not my fault that females get upset because they have a large repair bill. You know, this is the sign of the end times. A woman shouldn’t know about cars. This is the future the liberals want. This is automotive wokeism.”
We reached out to Finley for her rebuttal and her take on Williams’s generally shocked reaction to a woman having a detailed understanding of her own vehicle. “He and his two-inch penis will just have to get over it,” said Finley.
