Bentley Trades in Reputation for NFT Profits

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A golden Bentley symbol is shown on a dark background.

Bentley Motors Limited is one of the most prestigious and well-respected names in the auto industry, with more than a century of legendary reputation behind it. First founded in 1919 by W. O. Bentley, they have developed historic vehicles and forged a legacy of cutting-edge engineering and design. Few other names in the auto industry conjure up such a sense of beauty and style, such bold creations and remarkable innovations as the word “Bentley.” Now, building on this truly incomparable tradition and its place as an icon of the civilized world, they’ve chosen to throw it all away and chase after the NFT market.

What Are NFTS?

I’ll make this simple for you – no one really knows. Okay, so some people do actually understand what NFTs are and how they work, but they need about 2,000 words to explain it to you in a way that’s actually helpful; by then, your brain will be so full of words like, “fungible,” and “blockchain,” that it will start screaming for the sweet release of death. Go ahead and read about NFTs and what they do if you want, but don’t blame me if you find yourself with your head in the oven.

The simplest explanation I can offer is this: they’re nonsense created by tech nerds for a myriad of online applications and co-opted by the rich to scam money out of others. Seriously, the boom is over – anyone pushing NFTs at this point is simply looking to have someone else holding the bag for them so they can sell out. Except for Bentley, of course, who are making a name for themselves by joining other automotive leaders like Chevrolet and Rolls-Royce, both of which have already leapt headlong into the shallow end of the NFT pool.

What Is a Bentley NFT?

According to the recent announcement from Bentley, it will be an “exclusive, sustainable NFT… a one-time NFT drop on the carbon-neutral Polygon network… limited to just 208 pieces.” They’ve chosen to keep it limited to 208 because that’s the top speed of their Grand Tourer, their fastest Continental GT Speed, to be precise, and the total production run of the “iconic” R-Type Continental of 1952. They say it will be a “unique artwork created by Bentley Design and will offer unique access and exclusive rewards to holders.”

It should be noted that all of those words I just quoted are complete nonsense and mean absolutely nothing, much like NFTs themselves. They’ve chosen Polygon to host their NFT because the service recently earned carbon-neutral status and has pledged to be carbon-negative by the end of this year. Anyone even mildly interested in NFTs or crypto-currency will recall that they’re generally considered god-awful for the environment, so at least you can waste your money on the Bentley NFT without compromising your children’s futures (more than you already have by throwing away their potential inheritance – no really, the look on their faces in 40 years at the reading of your Will when they discover you’ve left them a Bentley NFT to share will be priceless!).

Do I Need a Bentley NFT?

No, you don’t – no one does. No one needs any kind of automotive NFT because they’re a garbage scam and a way for an industry that makes hundreds of billions of dollars to somehow squeeze even more money out of people. Stop it – stop buying this trash and start doing something productive with your hard-earned money. Or don’t; go buy it, see if I care. The point is the same: if you’re invested in NFTs, then you’re a trash-heap of a human being, and you should feel bad about yourself every day when you wake up in the morning.

Editor’s Note: Although it seems Bentley is a bit late to the NFT party since other carmakers have already done it first, we assume that won’t keep this from being a smashing success for someone, somewhere. This is sure to be a boon to all mankind as we can’t think of any historic examples of wealthy Brits preying on the poor for their own advantage, so why would they start now? Thank you.

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