Detective Pikachu Conspiracy Theory

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The detective Pikachu is shown with the words 'conspiracy theory' in front of a used car driving away.

Detective Pikachu, a recent and popular film adaptation released May 10th, has been quite the topic of conversation even with last season of Game of Thrones and the recent Avengers: End Game being released around the same time. The month of May saw a crazy surge in the entertainment industry as a whole, with Detective Pikachu being the icing on the cake for children and reminiscing adults. By May 27th, it has grossed a domestic total of $120,097,622. With the release of Detective Pikachu, the Pokemon Go app has also regained some popularity. Between the car accident which was re-played numerous times throughout the movie, and utilizing cars to hit Pokestops and hatch eggs with ease, used car sales have gone through the roof. Let me explain Charlie Day style how all of this fits into yet another Pokemon conspiracy theory.

After leaving the local movie theatre, I was stuck wondering why I wasn’t given a few cards with my ticket like the children were, but more importantly, “why are they incorporating cars into the franchize so much, within the past few years?” I began to lose sleep over this question, and over my sleepless nights, I found that there were two ways this theory can go. My first thought was that they were working on brand deals and trying to drive car sales, particularly used car sales, through the roof. Anyone who played Pokemon Go, which is nearly everyone, knows that it’s much easier to gain XP, hatch eggs, and get to gyms and Pokestops when riding in a vehicle.

Pokemon’s demographic, while intended to be for children, was primarily geared toward Millennials, since we love our 90’s and early 2000’s nostalgia. Not a day has gone by that I didn’t wish I had my own pocket monster. There is more than enough evidence to prove that the release of Pokemon Go got Millennials off their butts, and out into the world. This generation is known for working smarter rather than harder, so it didn’t take us long to realize we can just drive our cars to level up, so to say. With Pokemon being the main priority, anyone without a car was looking for a way to keep up, leading to some going as far as to get a job to purchase a car. Obviously, used cars are easier and cheaper for anyone, so that’s where the sales were increasing for the automotive industry. While used cars have plenty of benefits, they’re more likely to break down, or cause accidents.

Between used cars being more unreliable and playing a game while driving, car accidents were rapidly increasing. Pokemon and Niantic did put in effort to minimize distracted driving, but was it enough? Not anymore. When Detective Pikachu was released, we see a car accident, the same accident, over and over. Talk about brainwashing! I wonder how much money Dodge paid for the 2007 Avenger to be in the overwhelmingly successful Detective Pikachu movie. Although in the movie the vehicle looked new, there are plenty of the exact same model available to purchase as a used car. The average price for this used car is typically under $10,000, but varies depending on the condition of the car.

Going along with this theory, I thought about the fact that Detective Pikachu and Pokemon Go are only a sliver of the Pokemon franchise. In the games themselves, we don’t see too many vehicles. This is what led to my second theory.

Illuminati CONFIRMED

With more used cars on the road, there is going to be more accidents and damages done. What if Pokemon’s intent wasn’t to get millennials off their butts and get jobs and used cars, but the aftermath of driving used cars? The world population has significantly increased over the years, and the numbers are pretty terrifying. It’s totally possible that the creators of Pokemon are trying to take the problem of the world’s overpopulation into their own hands, or the hands of something bigger.

With money comes power, and there’s no doubt that the Illuminati wouldn’t take in a company franchize that has a lifetime revenue hovering around  $90 billion across 122 games, and an entire generation dedicated and addicted to Pokemon. There are currently seven generations in the Pokemon series, and many more to come in the future. The history is there as well as promise for the future. If this is the case, then Detective Pikachu was only another piece to the never-ending puzzle.

So to clarify, at this point in the theory, we have the Pokemon, controlled by the Illuminati, who are trying to drive used car sales, glorify bad driving habits, and desensitize us to car accidents. Some of the car accidents caused by drivers distracted by playing Pokemon have been fatal, and that trend may not be going away any time soon. This connects to Detective Pikachu because we see a fatal car accident repeatedly through the movie.

What Should We Do About it?

Forget about the fact that pokemon is set in a world where animal fighting is not only legal but encouraged. Forget about the fact that we allow all of our information to be sold to and used by numerous government agencies. The Illuminati is clearly trying to kill all of us through used cars and making it seem like we did this to ourselves. Its a problem that it may be too late to pay attention to and the future of humanity is at stake.

All the companies that are involved would try to make you believe that they’re creating entertainment that we will love and will hopefully inspire us to do more for ourselves. They’re profiting off of us buying and crashing our used cars for population control, money, and power. Although it’s just a theory, its disheartening that nobody else has noticed, but it just may be the way things need to go. Maybe these major companies are on to something, and we’re such destruction that we need to turn into sheep in order to save ourselves, so maybe the Illuminati is onto something.

Avoiding Pokemon is not a plausible solution, because at this point there are too many of us that have succumbed to the addiction that is Pokemon. It’s gotten so out of hand that the only thing we can do is share nihilistic memes on social media platforms about our current situation instead of making any real attempt at being that change we wish to see. Keep playing your game, because we’re all going to die anyway, at least until big Pharma finds a way to make us immortal. The majority of us wouldn’t be able to afford it anyway, so I guess that doesn’t even matter. Whatever ends up happening, we’re all in this sinking ship together so we might as well go out catching ‘em all.

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