Some people might say that the 2022 Honda Odyssey is out of touch, that it’s an unnecessary vehicle in the modern market. Others would argue that updating and supporting a minivan in a world overrun by SUVs is a fool’s errand or that it demonstrates how Honda seemingly has little understanding of what customers in 2021 are looking for. In order to combat such claims, Honda has boldly grasped onto the meme trends of 2018 with an impressive new trim level, recently announced as exclusive to the Odyssey: the Chonky Boi trim.
This new trim, and its available packages, are sure to please internet denizens – colloquially referred to as “netizens” by news outlets that are woefully behind on modern lingo. However, I can’t help but wonder if the world is fully ready for everything it has to offer. Honda hasn’t announced all the details on it just yet, but what they’ve revealed is certainly something different from what other manufacturers have to offer.
Baseline Chonky Boi Trim
As you might expect, the main function of the Chonky Boi trim is to add significantly to the weight and size of the 2022 Honda Odyssey. This trim maintains the length of the Odyssey, at about 205 inches, and its height of about 68 inches. The standard Odyssey has a width of about 78 inches – but with the Chonky Boi trim, this increases to a stout 118 inches, nearly 10 feet in total width.
Standard 2022 Honda Odyssey models have a curb weight between about 4,400 lbs and 4,500 lbs, which is fine but far from “chonky.” Choosing the Chonky Boi trim will increase the curb weight to a much more impressive 6,122 lbs. Some fine chonk, indeed.
Three Available Packages
While the above numbers are for the baseline Chonky Boi, there are three packages available exclusively for this trim, which can significantly boost the chonk of your Odyssey. The “Hefty Chonk” package increases the height of the 2022 Honda Odyssey to just over 80 inches and the width to a solid 136 inches – boosting the curb weight to more than 6,700 lbs.
If you choose the “Mega Chonker” package, then the height is boosted to more than 84 inches, while the width increases to 152 inches and the Odyssey gets a curb weight of more than 7,400 lbs.
Finally, the available “Oh Lawd He Comin” package actually decreases the height back to the standard 68 inches but boosts the width to about 184 inches (yes, it rides more than 15-feet wide) and takes the curb weight up to more than 10,000 lbs. Unfortunately, the frame is not altered for the Odyssey, even with this package, and it’s virtually undrivable. But if you can get it moving, few will likely stand in your way or try to slow you down.
Looking Ahead to More Options
Since Honda has finally reached 2018, it’s clear they’ll have more interesting models and trims on the way. Rumors are swirling about an “Is this a Pigeon?” trim for the Honda CR-V, and at least one report has suggested their engineers are working on a “Sedans are Overrated: Change My Mind” model for the Civic. The future certainly looks bright!
Editor’s Note: We have been unable to reach anyone at Honda for verification on this story because our power recently went out. There’s a large spider on the power box with the surge protectors, and none of us are willing to deal with it, so we’re just sitting here in the dark, hoping that it will leave. Please send some help! Thank you.