Boston Harbor

For New England football fans, 2018 is shaping up to be a hard year. It seems as though the hits keep coming, adding fuel to the fire of the regions trademarked hardness and emotionally-detached negativity.

On February 4th, during Super Bowl LII, New England Patriots Quarterback, Tom Brady, completed 28 of 48 passes totaling 505 yards. Resulting in 3 TD’s and zero interceptions, Brady was only faced with one sack (albeit an impactful strip-sack). Translating to an adjusted net of 560 yards, Brady (over 49 dropbacks) rated 11.43 yards per attempt, earning him the ‘Best Passing Performance’ in Super Bowl history. Alas, those particular records were not enough to salvage a win for the reigning world champions. And it seems that the hits keep coming…

As if their upsetting 41-33 loss to the Philadelphia Eagles wasn’t bad enough, the Pats organization and their uber-loyal fanbase faced a great deal of disappointment during the month of March. With wide-receiver Danny Amendola signing on with Miami, cornerback Malcolm Butler headed to Tennessee, and both running back Dion Lewis and tackle Nate Solder also departing the roster, there is a sense of a mass exodus out of Foxboro. Where this leaves Patriots dynasty for the 2018-19 season remains to be seen, but it’s entirely possible that fans may have some sleepless nights ahead of them.

Well, Massholes…before you turn your hardened and emotionally-detached cynicism inwards and cannibalize yourselves, rejoice! You now have a new target that you can direct your black-hearted soulless negativity upon for the next two years. And even better? That target is Denver!!!

To be clear, we’re not talking solely about the Patriots’ AFC West rivals. It’s safe to say that the Ford Motor Company occupies some of the space in New Englands’ collective crosshairs.

Ford’s announcement that 2020 will mark the return of the iconic Ford Bronco heralds countless speculation of exactly how the vehicle will be marketed, and all eyes are on Denver. Retired after the 1996 model year, the Bronco has been all but absent aside from being occasionally found among used cars, Denver drivers might encounter. However, it’s hard to argue with the overlapping appeal of the Bronco name. With that in mind, rumor has it that a number of Denver-based agencies have been pressuring both Ford and the Bronco’s organization to recognize what they believe to be obvious synergies worthy of cross-marketing.

With the Bronco’s offense led by the uninspiring Case Keenum, all eyes are on the NFL Draft to determine how John Elway plans to flesh out the team. It’s widely speculated that potential acquisitions include the likes of Penn State running back Saquon Barkley, Notre Dame Guard Quentin Nelson or a defensive player such as North Carolina State’s Bradley Chubb. Any way you cut it, this is a rebuilding period for the Broncos.

In terms of the SUV segment, Ford finds itself facing similar challenges. While they might rule all things truck, Ford clearly struggles to captivate crossover and SUV customers. Reintroducing the Bronco might be the perfect strategy for successful rebuilding.

The Lemon spoke to Chaz Kumstein, a veteran marketer within the automotive industry. Inquiring about the likelihood of a Ford Bronco / Denver Broncos cross-marketing effort, his position was clear. “Makes sense,” he said adding,”Now put the gun down.”

We attempted to get feedback from Denver-based Bronco fans, but everyone seemed to be away from their phones otherwise occupied with some healthy, outdoor endeavors. Luckily, New England fans were easier to come by, simply by visiting any of the 14 Dunkin’ Donuts locations within a square mile radius.

“No suh. Sounds wicked quee-ah to me,” offered Somerville MA resident, Murph Higgins. “I got four fahkin’ words for ya, kid. ‘Chevy’ fahkin’ ‘Silverado’ and ‘Tom’ fahkin’ ‘Brady’. Ugh. I’m so fahkin’ pissed, dude. SO, fahkin’ pissed.”

While we have no proof that Mr. Higgins has any professional experience in automotive or professional sports marketing, he did receive an impressive number of high-fives for his statement (along with half-a-dozen munchkins at no charge). He also punched a wall for no discernible reason.

With that in mind, we can only wait and see if the cross-marketing of the Ford Bronco and the Denver Broncos “makes sense” or if it’s deemed to be “fahkin’ quee-ah.”


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